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poppy field perspective.

this day.

this day made my heart literally feel like it might burst it was so full. this day brought me peace. this place was magic and i keep trying my darndest to hold onto all of the feelings of this day.

i don't know what you believe, or where your heart lies. if you believe in God or nature or something in between or nothing it all>>the truth is none of that really matters when you experience days like this day. everything just seems right, and true and connected and the only thing that matters is that you are alive and breathing and soaking all of it in. 

for me, i experience God/connectedness most intensely when i'm deep in nature. it absolutely blows my mind the way everything works together when i'm in awe of the world around me like i was this day>>the chaos and the beauty all to create a world that spins on a tilt with billions of people living and breathing and connecting and experiencing all of the same things...

after a double header wedding weekend that took me all over southern/central california, the last thing i wanted to do was stop out of the way for anything. i was totally exhausted, emotionally and physically. it's so funny how when we are feeling that way, just run down by life and love and the struggle of all of the things, reminders are set in our path to bring us back down to earth and sequentially, to lift our eyes toward the heavens and experience all of the beauty that lies around us. to remind us what's important, to simplify things for us and help us realize that beauty is found WITHIN each and every bit of it. the struggle, the heartbreak, the joy, the laughter, the exhaustion. if we just pause a moment, and take the road thirty minutes out of the way to breathe deep in a field of wild poppies, we are reminded why we are alive>>>simply to experience beauty like this. to feel connected to god and the earth and each other.  THAT is what this day was to me: a simple reminder that i am small, i am being taken care of, that the wind can hold me up and i need not worry because everything always works itself out and EVERYTHING, everything happens for a reason. that no matter which road i choose to take, i will learn from it. that i should never let the struggle make me hard, but quite the opposite>>>that i should live life with an open heart, finding beauty in everything, and trust the wind to hold me up, even after i've been knocked down.

looking back at these photos, i'm reminded of that day and am challenged about the type of person that i want to be. i'm not perfect. nobody is>>i blow it all the time. i get impatient, or sassy, or frustrated. i struggle to love well. i get caught up in negativity. i think too much. WAY too much...we all have our own personal struggles, but the point is to know that you are struggling, have grace with yourself and continue to work on bettering those things. to be an introspective person first... 

lately i've been working so hard on my heart, on that person. i want to be open, always. i never want to hold grudges or be guarded. i want to give grace consistently to myself and to others. i want to be the type of person who avoids gossip and negativity and does their best to perpetuate positivity and light. i want to be patient, with life and myself and others. i want to be genuine, approachable and kind. i want to give selflessly, and be generous without expectation or want. i want to love people so hard and give so much that it exhausts me. i want to know when to take time to regroup and be alone in my own head so that i can be the best me for those around me. i want to be honest, even when it's hard or scary. i want to be grey, and understand that although people may love differently than me or have a different heart, that i can love on them too. i want to exemplify a life that says its okay to be yourself, and that all of you is beautiful, even the ugly, sad or hurt parts because i want to be the type of person that will help those around me pick up the pieces of those broken parts and i want to surround myself with people who will help me pick up the pieces too...

i know i'm not always going to succeed at being this person every day, that's where the grace comes into play>>but thank goodness i have these beautiful images from oneuv my most favorite human beings to take me back to that place, and remind me that on this day, i was at peace with all of myself, and that i just need to take each day as it comes and live in the beauty of every single moment i have on this earth. that i need to take deep breaths and know that we are all in this together, from the stars to the wild poppies.  


"i love you all the way to god and back down through the trees." (-said to me by my lil man, and now from me to you)

all photos by the best KEITH A SAVAGE


madwell//siren: the greenhouse.